Barhyte family emails

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Maybe we should have paid attention on game night. Know how to batten down hatches? My mom's coming on the 22nd. Maybe we should have paid attention on game night. Know how to batten down hatches? My mom's coming on the 22nd.
 +{| class="quote"
 +|Lunchtime mandate
 +From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte
 +June 25th
 +Mom's busy working in the guest room. I'm sneaking out and meeting you for lunch. You are not allowed to say "no." See you at the usual.
|} |}

Revision as of 17:54, 27 June 2008

The following is email correspondence between Glenn Barhyte and family members, mainly his wife Cecilia.

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

March 31, 2008

Remember when I was telling you about Eugene, that new pencil pusher in the records department? Well, get a load of this e-mail he just sent me:

<<<<<<<From: department of records>
< Just a friendly reminder: make sure to use our new plastic-coated paperclips when
< fastening your weekly reports. They're easier on the hands and they brighten up the
< office, too!
< Thanks,
< Eugene Randall

Can you believe this guy? Get a life, buddy!

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 1, 2008

Sorry honey

When I got home from work today, I found Burt tearing through the autographed copy of your favorite true-crime novel, "The Lieutenant's Way." Then, he threw up all over your vinyl collection. I cleaned up the mess the best I could, but I don't think any of those records will play anymore.

Love you,

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

What? How did Burt get to the top shelf in my den? That book was irreplaceable. Damn mutt!

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte


Burt would never destroy your stuff - he's a good boy! Hope I didn't freak you out too bad.

(Still) Love you,

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Oh, geez. I can't believe I fell for that. Guess my mind's on other things. Good one, Cel.

Give Burt a sloppy, wet kiss for me.

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 9, 2008

Just wanted to apologize because I won't be home until late tonight - got ssome business to do.

Stay sexy,

Checking in

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 11th, 2008

Did you take your heart medication this morning? If the answer is no, then I’m going to meet you for lunch and bring you those "damn pills" (as you call them).
--Your favorite wife

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

As much as I’d love to have lunch with you, I already took my meds and I'm booked all afternoon with appointments.
When did I call them "damn pills?" You must be thinking of someone else.

Hey hon

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 13th, 2008

I got a funny feeling about this case I’m working on. Do me a favor and stay out of Little Italy today, alright?
Love you,

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Why would I go into Little Italy? Are you OK? Call me, weirdo.
Love you back,

FWD: Game Night

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 14th, 2008

< Hey, gang (oops - I probably shouldn't use that term loosely, what with our line < of work - JK!)
< It's time for another game night at my place. You bring the wine, I'll bring the
< fun. Get ready for some killer backgammon (there I go with the poor choice of words
< again!)
< --Melvin Finnigity

Don't worry - I already told him we can't make it. Oh, by the way, your mother's really "sick", in case anyone asks.

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Why did you cancel? I think an evening of Chinese Checkers and cheese fondue is just what you need.

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Well, then, why don't you go to Finn's house without me? I’m sure it'll be a blast.

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Don't get smart with me, mister.
See you tonight,

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 16th, 2008

The doctor's office just called and said they had the results of your test from your ER visit last week. You went to the ER without telling me? It's hard enough being the wife of a cop without worrying myself about that little heart condition of yours. TALK TO ME!

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Honey, don't get all upset about this, but I did go to the hospital on Sunday (was just a little off, no big deal). They changed my dosage and I'm feeling 100% better. I'm going to let you cool off for a bit and then I'm going to call you after my meeting and we'll talk about this rationally.

By the way, it's not like I'm a beat cop, dodging bullets every day. I work in an office (very exciting) - don't get all gloom and doom on me, OK?

Love you, love you, love you (I suck up pretty well, huh?)



From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 21st, 2008

OK, this time I know you forgot to take your heart pills. I tied a small thread to the medicine cabinet and, wouldn't you know it, the thread was unbroken when I checked it!
So, I'm coming to your office for lunch - that's a threat.


RE: Grrr

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

April 21st, 2008

Wow, looks like we have another detective in the family. Thread on the medicine cabinet? You've lost it, sweetie. Lunch will be great - see you then.


Thanks so much son!

From: Greta Anne Barhyte

April 23, 2008


I can't believe you sent me a computer! I had your brother set it up and then he taught me email, so now I'm truly "with it" as you kids say. You are a fine son - thank you!

Glenn, I worry about you so. You know, the Henderson kids all got into nice professions. Georgie is a airline mechanic now and Francis sells insurance. Have you ever thought about selling insurance? Myra says he makes good money. I could put you in touch with Francis if you'd like.

I love you!

To: Mom

The Henderson kids are a bunch of morons. They couldn't scratch two nickels together to get a dime. You never used to believe what Myra told you, anyway. What's gotten into you. ?

Don't worry about me. I'm a desk jockey. The only injury I'm risking is carpal tunnel syndrome. And besides, I like putting away the bad guys.

Love ya, Mom
Your favorite son

How do I get on the computer?

From: Mom

April 27 2008

Glenn, this is your mother. How do I get on the computer? It's not working. I can't get on the computer. Please help.


FWD: RE: Possible Consultation

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

May 1st, 2008

Cel - get a load of this touchy-feely quack. She sent me the following message about tomorrow's session. I can already tell this won't last long... or, maybe she'll hypnotize me and turn me into a shaman dream warrior - who knows?

< < Glenn, I'm so happy you changed your mind about using my services. I'm

< All the best, < Dr. Zelda

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Keep an open mind, grumpo. There's no use in seeing a shrink if you don't listen to what she has to say. Besides, what are you afraid of? You think she's going to diagnose you as a nutjob? I could save her some time - I ALREADY KNOW YOU'RE LOOPY!

Stay weird,

FWD: Welcome

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

I just got this e-mail from the big cheese. Not too shabby, eh?

--Glenn Barhyte, rock star

< Detective Barhyte,
< I've been hearing great things about our newest crackerjack in MCU and I wanted
< Looking forward to working with you,
< --Lt. Gordon

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

Congrats darling! An email from the boss, let's frame it! I knew I made the right decision not marrying Richie. Who cares if he's got three homes? I've got you babe.

Sorry I didn't reply sooner - I woke up sick to my stomach today. Maybe it was the conversation about your Mom coming to visit..JUST KIDDING!

-- Me

You Are So Cool

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

June 9th, 2008

Hey Sexy - Just wanted to congratulate you on the first day of your new job! I knew you were going places. I love you, tiger. How's it goin?

Hey! The job is going ok - the first hour was bone-chillingly intense. Just kidding. Everyone seems to be pretty cool, and I've met a couple of the people I'll be working the narcotics beat with - they're pretty hardcore. Actually I'm pretty excited - not as excited as when we play twister, but almost!


To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

June 9th, 2008

Mark your calendar, hun. We're being knighted or something.



From: Mom

June 9th, 2008

Help! I lost all my web sites. What do I do?

You can't lose a web site. What do you mean exactly?
I used to see my things on the side of the web and now they're gone and I can't go anywhere. Did I do something wrong? Also….the little blue man is gone!
I think you mean your bookmarks. Hold down the "shift" key on your keyboard and then press "m" one time. Let me know if that works.
You're a genius!

Love, Mom

I'll show you some more tricks when you're here.

New Mattress?

To: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

June 11th, 2008

Noticed that Feathers is having a sale on twin mattresses. The bed in the guestroom can really use a new one. Mom would like it when she visits. I'm going to stop in after work. We can charge it and pay the bill right away from my check next Friday. Want me to pick you up? We can get dinner after. You said you were having cravings for lobster and ice cream!

Sounds like a date. Did you notice if they have anything smaller on special?

Intruder alert!

From: Cecelia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

June 17th, 2008

Maybe we should have paid attention on game night. Know how to batten down hatches? My mom's coming on the 22nd.

Lunchtime mandate

From: Cecilia "Sugarpants" Barhyte

June 25th

Mom's busy working in the guest room. I'm sneaking out and meeting you for lunch. You are not allowed to say "no." See you at the usual.

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